James Joseph Brown, Jr.- May 3, 1933- December 25, 2006 (In Loving Memory)

Courtesy: Dersu/YouTube

As we all mourn the loss of James Brown, let us remember the great hits over the years. I Got You (I Feel Good); It's a Man's World;
Papa's Got a Brand New Bag.

Here's footage from the CBS Sunday night staple, The Ed Sullivan Show (yes, I know, you've just watched I Feel Good on the previous video, and he sings it as part of a two song medley, but just look at that funky footwork).

zlud/CBS/YouTube

And here he proves that he's a Sex Machine:

sexyonion/YouTube

We know of his troubles with the law and what not, but let's not focus on that. Just listen to the music. Enjoy the music. Dance that funky dance, and get on that Good Foot, as if you were James Brown.

Words cannot describe the enormous impact Brown had on the music woirld. Rap. Soul. Even disco. And the rock world. It's just too much...the loss of this music legend is just beyond enormous. Way beyond enormous. Way beyond comphrension.

Here's To The Merriest of Christmases (Thus Far)

Here's something to entertain you as we all enjoy the Christmas holiday.

ANd let's here what Vanessa has to say:



And Suzanne...

Note to Rosie O'Donnell: Open Up a Can of SHUT THE HELL UP!

First, Roseann O'Donnell- you know, the bloated bitch we know as 'Rosie O'Donnell'- makes fun of Chinese people on ABC's The View. Making a lot of Chinese folks very happy, no doubt that she's followed Seinfeld alum Michael Richards' lead.

But now, Kelli's (soon-to-be-ex...that is if Kelli comes to her senses) spouse may have really outdone herself.

For the last 2 weeks, the drama on Mount Hood (fifty miles east from where I write this entry) has the country holding its' breath for the remaining two hikers- Brian Hall, 37; and Jerry Cooke, 36. And mourning over the recent loss of the third, Kelly James, 48. James' bosy was found Sunday in a snow cave. (At press time, the search has turned into a recovery effort).

The Queen of Not-So-Nice said on The View that money- around $2.5 Million thus far- shouldn't be spent on finding the hikers.

Well, Rosie, let's see you climb Mt. Hood- or let Kelli climb Mt. Hood (or any other mountain) and get lost and see how you feel. Will all of those millions you enjoy save your fat, ignorant, and barely pea-sized brained ass if you were to get caught in an avalanche or severe snowstorm? You're freezing your wart-infested* pussy off, and cannot be found for days, perhaps weeks. Let's see how you handle that, Ms. Queen of Bitchville! Bet you change your mind when the shoe's on the other foot.

*as for as we all know, Ms. O'Donnell doesn't have genital warts. Just a tounge in cheek comment. Don't go a-bitchin', folks.

Perhaps Cyn McKinney Deserves Another Chance

A quartet of black Capitol police officers talk about trouble in the Capitol Police Department, in Washington, DC.

The Sadness of Sex- My Distraction

As I was working on the year end review- it'll be out on December 31- I watched this episode of the spoken word comedy The Sadness of Sex.

Here's the final episode I got courtesy of iFilm.com.

Perhaps We Should Impeach Cynthia McKinney Instead

Oh, that Cynthia Ann McKinney. What can I say about her except:

1. She's still a fucking crybaby
2. She's still a goddamned race-baiter
3. I'm glad she LOST her bid for re-election.

Now, she's attempting her latest act of...er, jackassery, perhaps. Her political career already in flames, she's bound and determined to go out in a blaze of glory by joining the bandwagon of those who call for the impeachment of President George W. Bush.

Now, do I think that Bush deserves to be impeached for starting a pissing match with Saddam Hussein, al-Qaida; and the Taliban? Honestly, I think not. After all, unless we want America to be a vast wasteland that's uninhabitable for 100-plus years, it would be better to fight those al-Qaida pussies abroad than here (of course, what's not to say that some aren't already here? Thank God for the Second Amendment. I'll be damned if I let some Islamofascist cross the line in the sand. Celebrate the bullet, pricks!). Admittedly, we do need a change of course in the War on Terrorism. One where we shoot every insurgent on site. Either that, or go for zero tolerance, which in and of itself is risky. But unless the Iraqi forces are clearly on the side of the Allies (US, UK; Australia; etc.), how are we supposed to know who our friends are. But I don't think Bush needs to be impeached for what he believed to be the right course of action.

But Cynthia McKinney, to me, is performing her last act of desperation and is trying to make a name for herself- a friend says that she's fighting for the common man, woman, and child. What a load of horse manure! Until I see otherwise, until Cynthia McKinney proves to me- and many others!- that she's not some race-baiting, conniving crybaby, I'm not going to cut her any slack. I'm doing the same thing to her that I do to every politician- no matter the race, gender, political affiliation, ideology; etc.

I'm holding her feet to the fire. After all, until she leaves the halls of Congress next month, she's held accountable.

Peter Boyle- An Appreciation

This scene is from the 1974 hit comedy Young Frankenstein starring Gene Wilder and Peter Boyle.

Last night, we lost this comic genius to heart disease and multiple myeloma, a cancer that causes the body to create too much plasma.
Boyle is also know for his role as the cantankerous father, Frank, on the CBS hit Everybody Loves Raymond.




Boyle also acted in films such as Joe (1970), where he played an Archie Bunker type (Susan Sarandon co-starred); Slither (1973); Taxi Driver (1976; co-starred with Robert You Talkin' To Me DeNiro and Monster's Ball (2001), where he played the racist father of Billy Joe Thornton. In his career, he won an Emmy for an appearance in The X Files
and was nominated numerous times for his role on Everybody Loves Raymond (but never won. He was the only cast member not to win an Emmy during the show's 10-season run). His final appearance will be in Shadows of Atticus, which was completed at the time of his death Tuesday night. His last film appearance was in this year's The Santa Clause 3, co-starring Tim Allen and Martin Short.

But Boyle will forever be immortalized as Igor and Frank.

He is survived by wife Lorraine, and daughters Lucy and Amy.

Boyle was 71.

Talk About a Life in the Shitter II: Should've Gone to Church Instead

More details have surfaced on Joe Jackson, the man who shot four people- three of them fatally- before being shot fatally himself.

A church deacon. Trucker. He thought that if he invented a toilet seat for truckers- to put in back of a truck, I presume, he would see riches.

Instead, he felt that patents attorney Michael McKenna- one of the people he killed- gave him a raw deal. However, it turns out that Michael McKenna wasn't the lawyer (another lawyer of the same name, patented the toilet years ago. And that McKenna lives in Boston...).

Click on the title for the full story from Chicago's NBC 5.

Talk About a Life Ending in the Shitter

Friday night, a man who thought he was cheated out of a patent decided to go on a rampage. In the ensuing carnage, three people were shot dead before the gunman himself was killed.

In the Citibank Building in the West Loop area of downtown Chicago, 59 year old Joe Jackson took a guard hostage, then forced the guard to take him up to the 38th floor, where a law firm- Woods, Phillips, Clark & Mortimer is located. The firm specializes in patents.

Police stormed the floor, and shot and killed Jackson.

The patent Jackson thought he was cheated out of was of a toilet for a truck, probably a big rig (after all, those 18-wheeling guys and gals don't always amke it to the next rest stop- or for that matter, truck stop...).

The link to this story can be found by just clicking on the title.

A shitter for a rig...sounds rather interesting. Just don't let the waste fall all over the cargo.

Joe Jackson apparently was pissed that someone else was awarded the patent to something he himself (apparently) invented. I don't know the full story behind the invention, but...when it comes to money, sometimes fights deteriorate into deadly force.

Why I'm Mixed on the Word 'Nigger'

Time columnist John Ridley- who like myself, is African-American writes an excellent essay on the word nigger in the latest issue of Time. (click on the title for the link). He cites examples from the 1975 Saturday Night Live skit with comedians Chevy Chase and the late Richard Pryor, to Dick Gregory's desensitizing the word ( Gregory did this in his preface to the Robert H. deCoy book from the early 1970s The Nigger Bible).

But for so many of us, nigger is an insult. Yes, I know, a lot of us black folks use it, mainly in the form of nigga, and such, but even as I speak for myself here, I also speak for countless of other black folks and will say that I don't like the word- in any form- coming out of anybody's mouth. No matter what racial orientation the person/people claim themselves to be.

Michael Richards- and more recently Andy Dick's- use of the word hurt many of all racial proclivities. In Richards' case, it was because he was frustrated over hecklers. Dick tried to make light of it, but like John Kerry's recent joke about education over Iraq gone awry, it bit him (and Richards) right in the ass. Sure, we hold celebrities to a higher- or lower- standard, but like the rest of us, they're human, too. Whether they like it or not.

Now here's why I'm mixed on the usage of this word. For one, although I don't like hearing it from anyone, I still believe that they have a right to say it. The First Amendment, which I very strongly believe in and strongly defend, gives a person to say whatever they want, in any shape or form. Including the words nigger; coon; jungle bunny for a black person. Or honky; peckerwood; ofay; trailer trash; or cracker for a white person. or any other epithet. Of course, we should be intelligent enough not to use these slurs, and a lot of us are intelligent enough to tell the offending party that such words are offensive (though, that probably still won't change the fact that your ass might get kicked by a member of a minority racial group should you use a slur against them...).

There's this excellent book that came out about five years ago- written by an African-American by the name of Randall Kennedy- called Nigger: The Strange Career of a Troublesome Word (Pantheon Books, 2002). It explains the origin of the word- which as we all know, wasn't originally meant to for use to insult black people (just like the swastika wasn't originally meant for a symbol of white supremacy or hatred. The swastika originated from Tibet...another discussion for another day...),and cases where such usage of the word got folks in hot water. Plus, it discusses the double standard the word has (hence, the nigger/nigga connection). A recommended read, indeed.

Race relations here in America are- at best- chaotic (at worse, perhaps nearing the boiling point. Those white supremacists just may get that RaHoWa- Racial Holy War- yet. But as the saying goes, be careful for what you pray for. You just might get it. Only the results may not come out the way you had wished for. And you know that a lot of us black folks are viciously sick and tired of getting the short end of the stick). If we are to be the greatest nation on Earth, then we must drop our weapons of hatred and bickering, talk out our differences, work out a concensus or two, and continue the healing. Otherwise, the al-Qaidas, the Talibans; the Hezbollahs; possibly the Iranians and North Koreans; and the Hamases will take care of the problem for us- only none of us will be around to fight them. Or each other.

In closing, many of you have heard of Jerry Springer, and the crazy talk show he does daily. Here in this clip from WMAQ-TV NBC5, Chicago (where the show is produced, he tears a new ass hole into a fellow employee who quit over the station's decision to let him do periodical commentaries on the newscasts. I think that his argument is pretty relevant here. Ladies and gentlemen, Jerry Springer.

ValienteVejete/YouTube/WMAQ-TV, Chicago

Clip: Copyright 1997 NBC Universal, All Rights Reserved.
This entry: Copyright 2006, by Darren W. Alexander. All Rights reserved.

The Confession Heard Around the World

Several weeks ago, Tom Leykis did a live remote from Barracuda night club here in Portland.

It was here that a woman, apparently from the Phoenix area, called the show, and confessed that the suicide her boyfriend had committed was actually a HOMICIDE committed by the woman herself.

And now, the Phoenix police are looking for her. Even if the call's a prank, she's still in deep ca-ca. So either way, she loses.

Here's the audio from that confession:

Sounds a Bit Hypocritical, Doesn't It?

A man from Reno, Nevada- 54 year old gregory Lee Rumora- says that he's a vigilante against internet child porn.

So, apparently, he can't seem to explain himself when police found child porn with his lovely mug on it. Rumora also tried to extort an unidentified LA radio personality out of $30,000.

He's in the Washoe county, Nevada jail on suspicion of extortion and posession of child pornography.

Godspeed, Ed...and You Too, Robert

Today in New York, the great Ed Bradley was eulogized at Riverside Church in New York City. Among those who spoke glowingly- deservedly so- of Ed were former President Bill Clinton; jazz musician, and close friend Wynton Marsalis- who co-founded the Jazz at Lincoln Center Museum with Bradley, and Aaron Neville. Entertainer Bill Cosby also spoke. Bradley's close friend, singer Jimmy Buffett sang Do You What It Means (to Miss New Orleans)?

Bradley died November 9 from complications from leukemia. He was 65.

Last night, we lost another great. For those of us who remember the TV series M*A*S*H, the sitcom was, of course, a spinoff from the hit comedy movie of the same name. Both, of course, dealt with the Korean War.

The man who directed the movie version of M*A*S*H was none other than Robert Altman.

Altman directed many films, from Nashville (1975) to Gosford Park (2001) over a 50-plus year career. He also directed television episodes of Bonanza and Alfred Hitchcock Presents. Actors would line up- even take a pay cut, if needed be, to work with the caustic and irreverent writer and director. His relationship with Hollywood was- at best- chaotic, but Altman refused to compromise quality for the sake of entertainment.

His final film was this year's adaptation of Garrison Keillor's popular stage show A Prarie Home Companion, which came out in May.

Altman died last night in Los Angeles at 81.

Uh-Oh...It's Another Episode of FOOT-IN-MOUTH-DISEASE!

I'm bringing stupid back/
Those fucking niggers don't know how to act/
Those dumb ass crackers/they just want to...
Get your stupid on/Get your stupid on/ Get your stupid on...
(In the tune of Sexyback...with apologies to Justin Timberlake)

Excuse me...hi, your tour guide Darren here, and as you can see, I have parodied Justin Timberlake's Sexyback to a more vicious tone, if you will. Of course, my apologies to Mr. Timberlake. But I couldn't help but to parody the tune due to the fact that, yes, another celebrity has done it again.

As if Mel Gibson's drunken tirade against Jews wasn't enough, now comes word that Seinfeld alum Michael Richards, who played Kramer on the hit 1990-1998 NBC sitcom, did a little stand up this weekend at LA's Laugh Factory comedy club. Only, the stand up act kind of bombed. Just click on the title and watch.

A couple of black hecklers dis Richards, next thing you know, we're back in Mississippi, circa 1950.

Sure Richards has the right to show his true colors- or perhaps he was pretty frustrated (over not having a hit TV series) Being a bomb at stand up, man, what is it? One minute he has the audience kind of in stitches, the next, half of them want him off the stage (the other half wants him dead).

Apparently, Mr. Richards hasn't learned from Mel's little predicament, has he?

I may have to take a break from watching Seinfeld. But if you find it in your hearts to forgive him, go ahead. I'll forgive, but definitely won't forget.

Click to http://www.tmz.com/2006/11/20/richards-im-really-busted-up/

Ed Bradley- An Appreciation

How can one describe the illustrious Ed Bradley? Sure, he had many firsts- the first African-American White House Correspondent for a major broadcast network, among other things. But there is no one word anyone can describe the man colleagues called " Mr. Cool". There is no one label you can put on the man who began his broadcasting career as a part time DJ in Philadelphia (he moonlighted as a DJ while teaching sixth grade). The man raised in a tough Philadelphia neighborhood, who went on to greater heights as a reporter, and for 26 years, a correspondent to TV's longest running magazine series has been lost today to leukemia.

Vote Like You Were Dying

Today, true believers, is Election Day. This means that many Americans are out at the polls voting for the candidates who they believe are best for the responsibilities of taking care of their states; cities; congressional and senatorial districts, and other offices.

Now, for the record, I voted weeks ago- I live in Oregon, which is a vote by mail state. I'll tell you how I voted, and why I voted the way I did in one of my other blogs, "The Week in Brief". I'll also give you the results of the races and ballot measures here in Oregon and a few other states.

But let me tell you why I believe that you should go out and vote today.

For years, I've been hearing people bitching about the officeholders and measures they don't agree with. I sak these people, "did you vote?" A good number of them tell me "no", then I ask why. Some don't believe that their voices count. Others believe that their candidate won't win no matter whether they vote or no.

But to those naysayers, I tell them, "your voice does count". After all, if you don't vote, you have no right to gripe about why this candidate won, or why these measures passed. If only these people would just give up their apathetic attitudes and go out to the polls- or in the case of the states of Oregon and Washington- mail in their ballots (or send those ballots to authorized drop spots at such places like the county election headquarters, or even the public libraries). Even if the candidates of your choice don't win, or the measures you opposed passed (or vice versa- the measures you supported failed), at least you can rest easy knowing that you've used your voice at the ballot box.

And if you're like myself, African-American, it's your responsibility to get out there and vote. No matter the weather- hey, we've been deluged by torrential rains the last two days here in Oregon and Washington. Still, a lot of us black folks are still voting today- or even if you're a bit infirm, get someone to help you get to the ballot box. No matter how long the lines, no matter how bad you're getting intimidated- and I've heard at least one or two reports of this (some incumbents will do dirty acts just to keep their office). And no matter how negative those political ads of recent weeks (a lot of black folks were pissed at the one lampooning Harold Ford, Jr., Democrat Congressman out of Tennessee, running for the US Senate against Republican Bob Corker. They saw it as racist. See my entry "How Nasty Can You Go? Let The Mudslinging Continue" by just clicking here at http://www.alexthegrinch.blogspot.com/2006/10/how-nasty-can-you-go-let-mudslinging.html). Just go out there. Vote. A lot of blacks have fought- and some even died- for this right to vote. Don't you dare take this right and responsibility for granted.

May the candidate and ballot measure of your choice, win, but even if she or he doesn't, at least you can go to bed tonight knowing that you have performed your civic duty.

It's Gonna Be a WHAT?!!

Is Faith Hill pissed that she lost to newcomer Carrie Underwood in last night's CMA Awards?

Underwood, winner of the 2005 American Idol competition, won female vocalist of the year. Faith Hill apparently took offense, turned to the camera, and appeared to say "What?!!"

Now, Mrs. Samuel Timothy Smith (Tim McGraw's real name. Of course Tim's daddy was the late Phillies pitcher Tug McGraw) aka Audrey Faith McGraw (her real name. Perry's her maiden name) insists that she was joking when she did her act. I don't know, baby. It sounded like a call out for fightin' baby (cue song, "You ain't Woman Enough (To Take My Man)", by Loretta Lynn. Only substitute "Award" for "Man" and have Carrie sing the song...).



Shifting gears, today is, of course, election day. Go out and vote (I'll tell you why in my next entry).

Ted Haggard- New Pastor of the Church of Pussies

Last week, a gay escort stepped forward to mention that the Rev. Ted Haggard, pastor of New Life Church in Colorado Springs, Colorado, had sex with him, gave him a massage and took meth. This in response to Haggard's support for an amendment in Colorado, Amendment 43, that would put into the Colorado constitution a law that marriage would be only be between a man and a woman. (The paranoia ensues, folks...).

This weekend, Haggard resigned as pastor of New Life, a 14,000 member church. He wrote in a letter that he had "committed sexual immorality..." and that he was a "depraved man."

I call him a man who is running away from who he is- a gay man.

Yes, true believers, the good reverend is what I'd like to call a gay man in deep denial. He has been taught to hate himself, use the Bible as an excuse to hate the very thing that God made him- a man who happens to like men. Oh, sure, Haggard is a married dad of five, with a lovely wife who is probably a bit less loving and supporting amid these revelations. But the question I must ask Teddy Bear (can I callyou that, Ted? Thanks...) is (cue song "How Long (Has This Been Going On)" by Ace) Yes, Ted, how long have you harbored sexual feeling toward guys? How long have you've been craving dick over pussy? How long have you known that youjust daydreamed that you were in a nightclub in Denver, dancing among hot, sweaty, and gorgeous hunks?

I see that the Exodus International- the scam that calls itself an 'ex-gay' ministry (of course, there's that <33% success rate you've got to take into account...hmmm...)- has worked for you, Ted.

Look, Ted Haggard, whether he believes it or no, has just admitted that he's gay. Nothing wrong wioth that. Except that he's beating himself over it instead of embracing it. God still loves him, and God has a place for him to pastor. It could be a branch of the Universal Fellowship of Metropolitan Community Churches, or Reconciling Congregations of the United Methodist Church. Hell, the United Church of Christ openly accepts gay men, as does the Universal Unitarian Church.

But whichever church Ted Haggard chooses to pastor in say, a couple years or so (after he goes through the 'denial/grief/acceptance' bit...and after his divorce from his wife becomes final, should that come to pass), at least he'll be in good company. Praising God among those hot, gorgeous hunks. One of them being his new husband, no doubt.

Let's Talk About- and Visualize- Warm Weather

Right now, I'm in a state of boredom. I'm feeling tired, and...I'm ready to fall asleep. Now if I wasn't at the (Multnomah County Central) library, I would just go ahead and nod off. But I can't do this. So...

It's no secret that I'd much rather be elsewhere right now. Elsewhere being Los Angeles; Miami; or even Bora Bora. Lying in the sun, feeling the warmth on my skin. Sipping margaritas or pina coladas, surrounded by hot buxom ladies. Being softly killed by kisses, bare breasts, and kitties in the middle. Ah, yes. The life I desire. (Oh, don't forget, all of this being taped and/or filmed...after all, I need the footage for my self-taught lessons in using Final Cut Studio 5.1...).

So, as I put up- for a bit longer, at least- with the return of the winter rainy season here in the Pacific Northwest (and perhaps three to four months in Alaska at a seafood processing plant on, perhaps Dutch Harbor in Unalaska), I can be rest assured that before long, I'll be atop of the world in a condo; dancing to, say, Latino and black hip-hop. And, of course, seeing different babes nightly (okay, not every night. I need the break from time to time...).

I'll be in the sun sooner than I think. Believe it!

Prince- The Comeback. But At What Cost?

Prince Rogers Nelson- the artist forever known as just his first name- is opening a club in Las Vegas, Club 3121. It's located at the Club Rio hotel and nightclub on Flamingo Rd.

While I celebrate his success- hey, once a Prince fan, always a Prince fan- I kind of question this move.

You see, Prince is- or was, I don't know. I'll have to ask him directly- a Jehovah's Witness.

Let me admit my dog in the fight. I was once raised in that faith, in my youth. As almost everyone knows, the Witnesses don't celebrate holidays; vote in elections; have sexual relations- same sex or opposite sex- outside of marriage. They don't believe in same sex relationships- let alone same sex marriage. And although they're allowed to enter bars and nightclubs- provided that they're of the legal age, of course- such actions are highly discouraged. For the record, I haven't been associated with the faith for over 15 years (though my mother and at least three of my siblings are in the faith).

Which is why I must ask Prince why is he running one.

Now, if he's been disfellowshiped- excommunicated- then that's one thing. But if he's still a JW, are the elders at his church comfortable with him doing this. If not, I think Prince should seriously think about what he's doing.

Now Am I Glad That I Didn't Vote For Kulongoski?

In 2004, a rumor was confirmed in political circles. The rumor being that Neil goldschmidt, who was Oregon governor from 1987 to 1991, had sex with a (then) 14-year-old girl- all while mayor of Portland (1973-1979). Before the revelation- and subsequently Willamette Week (Portland's alternative weekly) reporter Nigel Jaquiss winning his Pulitzer for bringing down Neil- Goldschmidt was ashining star in local; state; and even national politics (he was President Carter's Transportation secretary).

In this online magazine, Counterpunch (http://www.counterpunch.com), Fred Leonhardt, who was the speechwriter for Goldschmidt, mentions that a lot of people knew of Goldschmidt's shenannigans. Including the current governor, Theodore Kulongoski (who's about to receive his retirement gift from the voters this coming Tuesday...maybe...). Leonhardt reportedly told Kulongoski- when the latter was Oregon's attorney general- about Goldschmidt's sexual dalliances with babysitters, and that later on, Kulongoski reluctantly wanted to keep Goldschmidt "...at arms length because he asks me to do unethical things..."

So, my question to the soon-to-be-ex-governor(?), did you know about Neil's pedophiliac tendencies? If so, why are you still sitting on this? Sure, if you were to speak the truth, Neil could have destroyed you. And you probably wouldn't be sitting at Mahonia Hall (the governor's mansion) today (and you probably won't be sitting there too much longer if voters have a say in the matter on Tuesday). If you knew about this, and you're not telling us, Ted...I don't know how you could sleep at night- let alone during the four years you've been running the state of Oregon (into the ground, but running Oregon nonetheless...).

Of course, this does parallel the recent Mark Foley debacle (you know, where Foley sent pornograph e-mails to male pages. No report of Foley ever sleeping with the boys. which is more than I can say about Goldschmidt fucking teenaged female babysitters...).

How Nasty Can You Go? Let the Mudslinging Continue

No doubt, you've seen the nasty mudsling commercials airing around the country. One particular commercial, run by the Republican National Committee and airing around Tennessee is a 'man on the street' ad depicting Democrat Harold Ford, Jr. as a player of sorts, and the wrong person for Congress (the ad ends with a blond telling Harold to call her). Many- particularly of the Al Sharton/Jesse Jackson discipleship- call it nothing less that blantant racism, liking it to the days of Reconstruction, when slaves in the South were freed (and of course pissed off white folks formed a little terrorist organization called the Ku Klux Klan. Imagine those hooded types getting together with another hooded group of people- Islamofascists. Hey, both groups hate Jews...). I looked at the ad, and just chalked the part with blondie up to just 'bad taste'. The candidate running against Ford is Bob Corker, and from watching his ads, he doesn't seem at all racist to me- and as almost everyone knows from reading this blog, I'm African-American.


In fact, I kind of find the commercial funny.

On Lars Larson's national show last night, I heard this ad depicting Wisconsin Democratic U.S. Congressman Ron Kind as a man weak on defense, but very,very, very horny (I find it pretty hilarious). Just watch.


Between now and November 7, things will get a lot nastier. Just listen to the radio and watch your televisions. Consider yourselves entertained.

No Surprise- Police Justified in the Killing of James Chasse, Jr.

The Multnomah County, Orgeon grand jury decided that the officers involved in the death of James Chasse, Jr., the man police thought was urinating in the street and was on drugs, was an accident. Chasse died on September 17, the result was blunty force trauma.

This doesn't surprise me one bit. They close down the mental health hospitals- via budget cuts, etc- then what happens next is that police are too ignorant (or worse, too dispassionate) to help. In other words, shoot- or beat- 'em first, ask questions later.

Now whether the jury made the right decision or no, that's for us to judge. Only, I can say that perhaps the police would've been better taking out the taser and zapping Mr. Chasse in lieu of playing romper stomper on him. Over 30 people say that the police were smashing Mr. Chasse's ribs- 16 of them were broken- and that they overreacted. No, sounds to me that the cops took joy in smashing the man to oblivion.

I feel for the family- the father, James Chasse, Jr., I personally know. Likely, the Chasses will proceed with their lawsuit against the city. I wish them luck on that.

Actions by the police, and the grand juries that exonerate those officers, cause many to lose respect for law enforcement. Until we hold those officers involved accountable, police abuse will continue. And we all lose in the end.

No Surprise- Police Justified in the Killing of James Chasse, Jr.

The Multnomah County, Orgeon grand jury decided that the officers involved in the death of James Chasse, Jr., the man police thought was urinating in the street and was on drugs, was an accident. Chasse died on September 17, the result was blunty force trauma.

This doesn't surprise me one bit. They close down the mental health hospitals- via budget cuts, etc- then what happens next is that police are too ignorant (or worse, too dispassionate) to help. In other words, shoot- or beat- 'em first, ask questions later.

Now whether the jury made the right decision or no, that's for us to judge. Only, I can say that perhaps the police would've been better taking out the taser and zapping Mr. Chasse in lieu of playing romper stomper on him. Over 30 people say that the police were smashing Mr. Chasse's ribs- 16 of them were broken- and that they overreacted. No, sounds to me that the cops took joy in smashing the man to oblivion.

I feel for the family- the father, James Chasse, Jr., I personally know. Likely, the Chasses will proceed with their lawsuit against the city. I wish them luck on that.

Actions by the police, and the grand juries that exonerate those officers, cause many to lose respect for law enforcement. Until we hold those officers involved accountable, police abuse will continue. And we all lose in the end.

Man, All Of This Multitasking is Giving Me a Headache

I can't wait until I get my own computer.

USing the library's computer, you only have an hour- which is fair. After all, everyone else can use it, too. (Of course, if you want to rent one from Kinko's, go right ahead. At least, there's no time limits on those. Just watch out for the charges, which can really add up).

There's this condo I'm interested in buying in the Miami area (I have the PDF file here. Just click on the title). Then, there's the info I've learned on Gund Arena in Cleveland- it's been renamed "Q Quicken Loans Arena". Man, what have they done? (The Q Quicken Loans chair bought the Cavs...oh, boy!). And I'm looking at Amtrak, as I seek to take a sabbatical from Portland, Oregon for high adventures (if not high crimes and devilment).

When I do get my own computers- and hopefully, I'll have them come month's end- I get to do a lot more blogging; a lot more video and audio editing...web surfing, etc. And more importantly,, I won't be using the Windows PCs that I'm typing this entry on now. Don't get me wrong. I love Windows, but Mac's a better system for me. I won't worry about that annoying 60 Minutes stiopwatch that's ticking in my head right now. Nor do I have to mind what I view, either (at least the Portland State library is much more liberal. The Multnomah County system, you have brats running around as I'm watching two lesbians getting it on. Man, that's ANNOYING!).

The day I get my MacBook; 17" MacBook Pro; and 24" iMac, I'll spend all day and night celebrating. Come morning, you'd have to pry me from those babies.

Vote NO on Measure 43

Did you know that a teen girl needs permission to go on field trips, get a tattoo, even get a prescription, doesn't need one to get an abortion in the state of Oregon?

It's true. And do you know why the girl doesn't need permission to get an abortion? It's probably because she's been raped by a stranger- or worse, by a relative by means of incest, and she's scared to tell anyone else about it out of fear of violence and shame.

There's a ballot measure, Measure 43, here in Oregon called "Protect Our Teen Daughters", and what this measure purports to do is to require teen daughters, 15 to 17, to tell mom and/or dad that she wants to terminate her pregnancy within 48 hours of such action. Now, the Yes on 43 people (go to http://www.protectourteendaughters.com for their site) want you to believe that a young teen girl has a judicial override- go to a judge- in case her picture perfect parents turn out to be more like Joan Crawford and O.J. Simpson. But here's why I disagree. Oregon has mostly small towns, and in small towns, everyone knows your damn business! Now, the parents could be chummy with the judge the girl wants to talk to about getting an abortion, therefore, that judge cannot be impartial. Plus, dealing with judicial systems, you have to go through channels, paperwork. Red tape. All while Mommy/Daddy Dearest continue to abuse their precious little girl.

Now, don't get me wrong. A girl should notify her parents about her pregnancy- except in the instance that she's in an abusive home, and telling the parent(s) would make things worse. And what makes you think that guy in robes, presiding over that kangaroo court, would make matters better, or even keep his mouth shut? I don't see the guarantees here.

I'm not so concerned with the alleged implications of 43 passing- that it would open the floodgates to banning abortion altogether. The good people of NARAL- whom I support- is doing plenty to make sure that Chief Justice of the United States John Roberts and Associate Justices Clarence Thomas; Antoin Scalia; and Sam Alito don't overstep the line between personal choice and forced pregnancies. And here in the "liberal" state of Oregon, we in the pro-choice movement will make sure that upon election- should he be so lucky- Governor Ronald Saxton stays on our side (yes, Saxton's a Republican, and yes, he's pro-choice... one of the reasons I'm actually crossing party lines to vote for him...).

Measure 43 is nothing more than government's attempt to run the lives of young women. If a fifteen year old girl chooses not to notify her parents, she should have that right. If she's in a very loving enviroment, she likely will tell them, however hard it will be.

No one- parent, and particularly government- should take that right away.

Join me in voting No on Measure 43.

Don't Screw Up, Torre!...James Chasse, Jr Jury Drags Its' Feet

Yesterday, I- along with the majority of America, for that matter- thought that Joe Torre, the current New York Yankees manager, would get the ax after losing two straight games in the American League Divisional Series- and the team not going to the World Series for the third straight year.

Well, it looks like Joe has another year to redeem himself. As mentioned this morning, Joe Torre will stay with the Yankees- thus feeling the fiery breath of Mt. George Steinbrenner for another season.

Now, I'm a Yankee fan (I'm also a Boston Red Sox fan. Glad I don't live in New York, what with these divided loyalties I possess...). So, as the wonderful and loving Yankee fan that I am, I have one word of advice for Joe: DON'T FUCK THIS ONE UP! Yes, if you want to make King George happy, very happy- then do your best in the 2007 season, bring New York another pennant (of course, if your crosstown rivals, the Mets of the National League succeed in the NLCS and World Series this year, then in a sense, they will have helped you bring one home...).

Until then, I guess that you'll be rooting for the Mets.


James Chasse, Jr.: A Tragedy
On September 17, 2006, James Chasse, Jr. was stopped by Portland Police. The officers involved thought that Chasse was urinating and was on drugs, so they proceeded to arrest them. Chasse struggled with the cops, and when it all ended, Chasse was on the ground and hauled off to the Multnomah County Justice Center. It was there that a nurse instructed the police to send him to the hospital.

En route to Providence Medical Center in northeast Portland, Chasse, 42, died.

Now I wouldn't give a rat's ass about this story had it not been for one factor: I know the victim's father, James Chasse, Sr. James, Sr. is a volunteer of an outreach program, Operation: Nightwatch, which serves the homeless and poor three nights a week (Thursday, Friday, and Saturday). Which makes it pretty difficult for me to take sides, you'd have to understand.
James, Jr. suffered from schizophrenia, but he was also a brilliant musician and artist. I never knew the man personally, but from accounts I've read, James, Jr. was very much a loved man by a family who did everything they could to help. I can imagine the feeling of loss that Jim, Sr. feels, losing a family member to the hands of the police.

The coroner ruled Jim Chasse, Jr's death 'accidental'. Jim, Jr. had sixteen broken ribs, no drugs or alcohol in his system

Jim Chasse and his family are considering legal action.

Today, the Multnomah County grand jury was supposed to render its' verdict. Now, we'll have to wait another week to find out whether criminal charges will be filed against the officers involved.

I don't know why there is foot dragging in this case. Are there more witnesses to come forward? Is the grand jury afraid to come forward in fear that there may be repercussions (read: hell to pay)?

What's taking them so damn long?

The Mighty (THUD!) Yankees

The curse of the Bambino has returned. Only, this time, the New York Yankees- the very same team that George Herman 'Babe' Ruth played with over 80 years ago- are the recipients.

Once a powerhouse team, the Yankees are now a national joke. What with them falling apart in Game 2 of the Ameriocan League Divisional Series- at home, nonetheless in the 'House That Babe Built' against the lowly Detroit Tigers. Now, it's the scrappy Tigers that are facing off against a tough Oakland Atheletics for the American League Championship.

Having said this, the talk has become very heavy on the future of Yankees manager Joe Torre. His head is in the guillotimne right now, just waiting for the blade that is George Steinbrenner to fall down (just pray for a clean cut, Joey). And if that's not enough, A-Rod- Alex Rodiguez- may not be donning the pinstripes for too much longer.

This morning, as I wrote my opening journal entry, I looked at three possible scenarios that could happen to Joe Torre. Let me run them by you. (I welcome your comments as well).

1. The Yankees Fire Torre. The likely scenario. Three years without a World Series ring, plus team chemistry gone to shit. Sure, Torre's an A-list manager who's sure to grace the next team who hires him. But his welcome mat in the Yankees organization is beyond worn. What will probably happen is Torre will take a year or two off from baseball, then return to the game as manager of another team. Like say, the Atlanta Braves or even the Chicago Cubs (not speculation or even a guess. I'm just using those teams as a example).

2. Torre Resigns. Face it, working for George Steinbrenner can be a major bitch! All of the pressure to maintain a 100-plus year old tradition in the House of the Babe, and going for their 27th world pennant, it can drive even the strongest man to tears.
And then to watch your heavily favored (to win that 27th World Series ring) team gets blitzkrieged by an underdog team like the Tigers, I doubt seriously that you want to face the volcano that is Mt. Steinbrenner (or if you prefer, a Category 5 hurricane named George). So the Yanks will give Torre the option to close the lights. Throw in the towel. Place his resignation on the desk of King George and make it appear like he's leaving the organization on good terms, and that he and Steinbrenner are chummy with each other.

3. The Yankees Keep Torre- At Least For Another Season. This is a hard decision that Steinbrenner faces. Torre has given him four World Series titles in the eleven years Torre has managed the Bronx Bombers. Torre is an A-list manager- just about every other Major League club would love him on their roster. So, despite the sometimes acrimonious relationship, Steinbrenner still sees Torre as an asset. If Torre does get a reprieve in the Yankees organization, he could get an upper level managerial position, like, say, General Manager or Senior Vice President of Baseball Operations. He could even manage one of the farm teams, say, the Columbus (Ohio) Clippers of the (AAA) International League for a season or two, then return to New York for another try with the Yankees.

But how likely is the latter two scenarios? (I'll give you a moment to think about it...)

Can't see Torre staying with the Yanks much longer? Neither can I.

Of School Shootings and Scandals

"I molested a few boys, so now, I'm going to rehab for alcoholism..."

Okay, so former US Representative Mark Foley, R-Florida, didn't actually say these words, but he may as well said them. Of course, there's no proof that Foley physically molested the (then) 16-year-old male page, but you can bet your ass that there's more to this story than what's being told.

And then, there's the revelation that the Republican leadership of the House of Representatives knew about the allegations. Monday, House Speaker Dennis Hastert, R- Illinois said that the House did not move agressively to investigate the charges that Foley exchanged sexual e-mails with the page. In other words, what these jackals are saying is that they did everything to basically sweep it under the rug, for fears that it may derail the Republicans' chances of keeping control of the House (many of the Representatives are up for re-election this year). Thanks, guys. Now the FBI's involved.

The copy of the Foley documents can be linked by clicking on the title.

Then, there's the rash of school shootings. Three in a week's time. The Bailey, Colorado shooting where a 54-year-old man shot a few girls, then the shooting yesterday in Nickel Mines, Pennsylvania, in an Amish community, where five girls lost their lives. And, of course, a kid didn't like his principal in Cazenovia, Wisconsin, so he killed him. At least two of the school shooting had one thing in common: the Colorado and Pennsylvania shootings were sexual in nature. In the Bailey shooting, the 54-year-old Duane Morrison, sexually assaulted six female students, killed one of them before killing himself. In the Nickel Mines shooting, Charles Carl Roberts IV, 32, tied six girls, shot all execution style. Five of the six died, and of course, Roberts shot himself dead. And now, the news accounts say that Roberts molested a couple of female relatives 20 years ago (go to http://www.nbc10.com/news/9991948/details.html for this story), and that at the time of the shooting, he had lube on him. No doubt, Roberts had plans for these girls.

The troubling thing here in all of this is all the parties involved- save for the 15-year-old assailant in Wisconsin- is that they all have or had sexual issues. Foley is single and Roberts was married with three children. More troubling is the fact that Foley worked on committees to protect children from exploitation- he even worked on a committee with the National Center for Missing and Exploited Children, founded by America's Most Wanted host John Walsh (see NCMEC's response at http://www.missingkids.com, and click on the appropriate site). Yet, he exploited young boys on the internet, which the last time I checked, was a federal offense. So, now that the FBI's in the game here, it looks like Foley's days of being free may be numbered.

Ron Saxton For Oregon Governor

This is the time where political campaigns begin to hit fever pitch. Where the knives get sharper, and the mud's aplenty. Between now and November 6, the mud hits the fan. Let the catfights begin!

And it's no different here in the Beaver state. Two major party candidates- the incumbent, Theodore 'Ted' Kulongoski, the Democrat is fighting to keep his job. Portland attorney Ron Saxton, the Republican, is challenging him.

In a recent poll, the man conservatives (namely KXL's Lars Larson) call 'Sleepy Ted' leads Saxton by five percent (43-38. I don't know the margin of error...). But the poll points being this close, it means that Kulongoski is in T-R-O-U-B-L-E.

Now, let me admit my dog in this fight. I'm a registered Democrat, and I, of course, traditionally vote Democrat. But in the last primary election, I voted for a Republican, Portland businessman David Lister, for Portland city council. (For governor, I voted for Kulongoski's opponent Jim Hill in the Democratic primary). The fact that I voted for a Republican means that I'm willing to cross party lines to help get the best possible candidate get into office, and that sometimes, folks from my party sure know how to botch things up.

And sadly, I must say this about Ted Kulongoski. Oregon, like many states, has an illegal ailen problem that has gone beyond pandemic. Sure, many of these illegals come here to seek a better life. But in doing so, they cost us, the hard working, honest living tax paying- and, most important, natural born and naturalized- Americans much more. I'm talking in terms of taxes, services, and safety, with great emphasis on the safety aspect. You see, imbedded among those seemingly harmless illegal ailens are drug mules; drug lords; and TERRORISTS! That's right, kids! I'm talking al-Qaida; Hezbollah; Hamas; and other Islamofacist and anti-American nutcase whose sole purpose is to wipe the good ol' U.S. of A. off the face of the terran map. Kill her people, and place in their tyrannical regimes. I'm sorry, but I don't think I can handle seeing Mahmoud Ahmadinejad sitting in the Oval Office, or members of Hamas, al-Qaida, and Hezbollah sitting in the chambers of Congress. Let alone the chambers of the Oregon Capitol in Salem.

And when it comes to taxes, Sleepy Ted suddenly wakes up from his hibernation and proposes tax increases- $800 F---ING MILLION?!!! We have 3.4 million residents here in Oregon. That's about $2.3 million per man, woman, and child, if I've done the math correctly. Then he's floating the idea of a sales tax- Oregon doesn't have one. And we don't want one, either (It has been voted down NINE TIMES! NINE TIMES! And Ted still doesn't get the message!)

Which is why I'm once again crossing (political) party lines and voting for thre Republican, Ron Saxton.

Ron Saxton will hold the line on taxes. He will not introduce new taxes; nor will he allow Oregon lawmakers to treat their congressional and senatorial districts like nightclubs.

Ron Saxton will put a halt to illegals getting driver licenses and other sources of identification. To be honest, I'd like to see him put a stop on the martricula card program here in Oregon, and hold employers to task if they decide to hire illegals (Social Security number don't match, you don't get hired. That simple!).

Now, I must add this disclaimer that the Saxton campaign did not put me to saying this. Nor am I being paid by the Saxton people- I don't even work for them. The words here are my own, Darren W. Alexander, the author of this blog and this entry. I am solely responsible for this content. You are welcome to click on the title, which will take you to the Saxton website. I have chosen to place this link there myself.

Could a Smoking Ban Be Coming to a _________ Near You?

This is a 'gray area' subject for me, I must warn you. After all, I consider myself an ex-smoker, yet I must confess that every once in a blue moon, I may sneak in a puff or two (especially if I'm enjoying a pretty good libation- and/or if I'm trying to get inside some woman's pants/skirt...anyway...).

The subject here is smoking bans, and about 2,200 jurisdictions in the US have bans on smoking in the workplace; in bars and bowling alleys. Some- such as the one in Washington State (just 10 miles up the road from where I'm at- in good ol' Moscow On the Willamette- Portland, Oregon) won't allow you to smoke within 25 feet of a building's entrance. Which means that the only place you can puff that Camel or Marlboro is in the middle of, say, C Street in the Vancouver city center. (Of course, there's this ban here in Multnomah County, Oregon- where Portland is located- this Ordinanace 937 that stopped this blog's author and (then) fellow smokers from smoking at that Wash World on Southeast belmosnt and 28th (it became law about 7 years ago...).

Now the anti-smoking nazis are at it again (I don't think that they stopped in the first place, to be honest). In my birth state of Ohio, there is this ballot measure, Issue 5 (what we call a 'measure' in Oregon, Ohio calls an 'issue', but both 'issue' and 'measure' are one in the same) called Smoke Free OhioThis measure, if passed, will ban smoking in workplaces, bars, race tracks (yes, Ohio has tons of them!); bingo parlors; even radio and TV stations (though I honestly don't know what banning smoking in media outlets has to do with the whole ball of wax here...). Go to the website http://www.smokefreeohio.org/oh/default.aspx for more information.

Then, there's the competing ballot measure, Issue 4, Smoke Less Ohio. It's pretty much the same, except with Issue 4, you can smoke in the bars, bingo halls. Otherwise, like Issue 5, it calls for a uniform smoking ban. There is a comparison chart between the two measures you can go to (at http://www.smokelessohio.com/SLO-SFO-comparison.pdf). Of course, the notable difference here is that RJ Reynolds and other tobacco companies are backing Issue 4.

Now, I may not puff up as much as I used to (in fact, these days, I've pretty much given up on the damn cancer sticks), but I still believe that if you want to smoke your lungs (and heart; and spleen) to oblivion (and risk erectile dysfunction and/or infertility, though admittedly, lots of guys smoked and still were able to keep it up- and put themselves into that skulldrugery that is FATHERHOOD!), more power to you, baby.

But I also have the right to walk away from that smoke. After all, I don't need the temptation to light up again.

The School Shooting in Colorado- Did Authorities Miss Something?

I'm going to play conspiracy theorist (for the lack of better words) here.

The shooting at a Bailey, Colorado high school yesterday no doubt shattered a small community. Six young ladies sexually assaulted, including one 16-year-old that was later killed by the shooter, 53-year-old Duane R. Morrison. Morrison, of course, killed himself as SWAT was moving in.

Morrison has a minor criminal record- obstruction of police in Lakewood; larcency and marijuana possession in the mid-1970s.

Call me suspicious, but I think there's more to this story than that. Given the nature of the crime, which was sexual according to authorities (I couldn't agree more), it makes me wonder if Mr. Morrison was a registered sex offender. And if so, from which jurisdiction? If he wasn't, then somehow, he managed to slither through the cracks and keep his sexual crimes under the radar. I'm picturing Duane Morrison with binoculars, leering at young girls...he could be masturbating, no doubt fantasizing about kidnapping some young girl- or two- and do what he damn well pleased with her. Of course, those horrid fantasies

I don't know, but there is more to this puzzle than what I'm hearing from media accounts.

So...When Exactly Will I Head to California?

I had a conversation with a friend of mine- no names please (only I'll mention that he's a few years older). This man is an Air force vet, and travelled the world ("...and the seven seas/everybody's lookin' for something..." I just had an Eurythmics moment here). He even wrote books, but lost the manuscripts to them.

I'll cut to the chase here. He's constantly telling me that I need to get things together, get my book published (though I thought I told him that I write scripts...challenging, sin't it? As you know I'm teaching myself Final Cut Studio, the video/film editing for the Macintosh, and Cinema 4D, a graphics program. Both programs are about to reach these grubby hands of mine...but, anyway...), and basically leave Portland. He's right on both counts.

So the question to myself: when exactly am I leaving Portland for Los Angeles? Yes, I thought about staying in Sacramento- albeit temporarily (and I still might, by the way)- but even if I do, it still doesn't change the fact that my backside needs to be in Los Angeles. After all, it sure as hell isn't going to come to me, is it? And I don't think some studio's going to come up to Moscow on the Willamette...er, Portland, Oregon, and say, "Darren, we'd love you to work for us." Doesn't happen, true believers.

So, having said this, I know that I'll be in California before 2006 is out. In fact, if I get my shit together, I'll be in the City of Angels in mid-October for Screenwriting Expo 5 (this year, the Expo's being held near LAX). And after I help vote (incumbent democrat) Oregon governor Ted Kulongoski out of office (and help put Ron Saxton in...hey, I'm Democrat, but I won't hesitate to vote for someone from the opposite party...), then I'll return to Los Angeles for awhile. Take those filmmaking classes I've been wanting to take forever, and start working in the industry.

But I've got to get working on this now, because if I wait any longer, I'll end up procrastinating, and find myself in a real mid-life crisis. As in "what have I've done over my 40 years (as of next July) on this planet?"

Okay, So He Goofed- T.O. accidentally ODs

Remember the news account that Dallas Cowboys wide receiver/diva Terrell Owens tried to kill himself last night?

Don't believe it!

As we know, T.O. broke his right hand in the Dallas-Washington game September 17. He's taking painkillers for the hand (hydrocodene...I wonder if it'll work on the damn toothache I'm screaming through now...). Apparently, he took a few too many pills, and when paramedics and police arrived, he was O-U-T of it. When asked if he was trying to harm himself, T.O. reportedly said "yes", when he meant, "hell, no, but I'm flying higher than a kite in a Ben Franklin thunderstorm right now." (okay, so I'm not from Texas. I'm not from Oregon, either. Still I lived here for nine years).

So for those who are worrying that our beloved flamboyant receiver has decided to play in the big Super Bowl in the sky, stop worrying. For those who were hoping that he would, well, let's just say that T.O's (right) hand heals pretty fast, and soon, he'll be eating defensive tackles for breakfast, lunch, dinner...and appetitizers.

How you like that?

Nevada War Widow Wins Right to Post Wicca Symbol on Husband's Grave

On September 25, 2005, Nevada Army National Guard Sergeant Patrick Stewart was a passenger on a Chinook in Afghanistan, probably coming from the field- or on his way there.

The Chinook was shot down by enemy fire, and Stewart was amoing the fatalites. He was only 34. While alive, Sgt. Stewart was a practicioner of the Wicca religion, considered a pagan faith by many circles.

His widow, Roberta, wanted to honor his memory by placing a Wiccan symbol on his plaque. However, the United States Department of Veterans Affairs does not honor the Wiccan symbols- mainly the pentacle, which is the pentagram inside a circle.

However, the state of Nevada does, and it has honored her request to place the pentacle on her husband's plaque.

Now, why the Department of Veterans won't recognize the Wicca symbol as a religious one, that's beyond me. But I can only surmise that it has something to do with the Judeo-Christian ways. After all, many say that the United States was founded upon Christian principles and values, and many see Wicca as anything but religious, let alone Christian. Sure, the Veterans department accepts the Jewish Star of David, and even Muslim symbols. But not the Wiccan symbols? That doesn't sound fair to me.

Kudos go to the State of Nevada, and to Mrs. Stewart in her continuing efforts to allow widows and widowers of soldiers who practiced Wicca to be recognized by our federal government.

Okay, So My President's The Fucking Devil (But He's Still My President)!

So, Iran's President/Dictator Mahmoud Ahmadinejad, and Venezuela President/dictator Hugo Chavez had the audacity to waltz their happy asses into the United States, and bad mouth her as if she was a cheap whore. Chavez even had the conjones to call President Bush the Devil. You know, Beezlebub. Lucifer. Serpent. Father of the world. Otherwise known as good ol' Satan.

President Bush being called The Devil. Makes me wonder Satan feels about having that title stripped from him.

Well, look. I didn't vote for Bush in either presidential election (I'm a registered Democrat), but bad mouthing him is like insulting a member of the family. Yes, Bush is a fucking jackass, but he's still my President, like it or not. And he'll be President until January 21, 2009 (barring illness; impeachment; or death- either by weapon or health deterioration).

I have the speech Chavez made. Just click on the title.

Serves Him Right- Maurice Clarett's Going to Jail!

I can't believe thaty I'm wasting my time on this fuck, but needless to say, I must (thankfully, for the final time).

As we now know, Ohio State football great-cum-street thug Maurice Clarett pled guilty in Franklin County (Ohio) Commons Pleas Court on two felonies- robbing two people at the Opium Lounge. He faced twelve altogether, but the deal brings him 3 1/2 years, as opposed to 7 1/2 had he been convicted on the other ten (in addition to the two he pled to).

I said this before, and I'll say it again- Maurice, you're a fucking disgrace! You could have had the NFL career, let alone being among the best Ohio State has to offer. You represented a pretigious university, world renowned, and ione of the best schools when it comes to college sports. and what thanks do you give the Ohio State University? You FUCKING DISGRACED IT! You decided that being a thug was more important than being a football player! You decided that you couldn't be among such babies in the college world, and then when your NFL career was derailed- by your own doing, I must add- you thought, "man, my world's turned to shit! I'm going to turn to robbing, stealing, and if I must, murder!"

Ironically, you're right about your world turning to shit.

You know, even if this dumbshit were in the NFL, he'd probably fuck that up as well.

Enjoy those three-and-a-half years in Lucasville, Maurice.

Perhaps They Should Bring This Commercial Back

I remember as a child seeing this commercial, from the Ad Council on stopping all kinds of pollution.

The above is a PSA (public service announcement) from the early 1970s. The Native American Iron Eyes Cody, played by (Louisiana-born) Espera DeCorti would row his boat across streams, then walk across the city and see litter strewn all over the place. Each commercial featuring Iron Eyes would end with a tear rolling from his eye.

There was also another commercial from another non-profit, Keep American Beautiful, that had two animated men, kind of like Dick Tracy, only they were wearing capes (you can see this by clicking on the title, and going to the appropriate area)

How To Enslave OJ Simpson

Man, I believe that the Goldman family has it out for one Orenthal J. Simpson- no relation to Homer and his clan of Springfield, Oregon.

What's going on here, you ask?

Well, as we all know, about 11 years ago, OJ Simpson was acquitted of murder. He was charged with killing his ex-wife Nicole and a friend of hers, Ronald Goldman. Believing that the 1968 Heisman trophy winner out of USC, and Buffalo Bills and San Francisco 49ers great got away with murder, Fred Goldman- Ron's father- and the remainder of the Goldman family decided to stick it to The Juice. A judge found OJ liable for the deaths, and decided that he pay $33.5 Million to the Brown and Goldman families.

Having not gotten the full amount yet, the Goldmans are now looking at one avenue that, to many, seems unique.

They want to own his likeness; his image; even his name. After all, even as Mr. Simpson is a pariah these days (come on, did anyone from Hey, ,
Get Me Off This Island! I'm A Celebrity come asking for him? Not even the reality shows are knocking at his door ,and his pay-per-view answer to MTV's Punk'd, Juiced, tanked...), he's still an icon. Any money OJ makes- outside his $25,000/month
NFL pension and his half-million home in Florida- the Goldmans want until OJ's been, well, juiced. After they get their moolah, then they'll leave him alone.

You have to admit, 11 years is a bit too long to be holding a grudge. Whether Orenthal killed Nikki and Ron or no, not many folks care anymore. If anything, perhaps OJ should be given another chance, so he can pay these folks (with portions of the money he makes from appearances and acting and reality TV jobs. Leave some for him, after all, the man's gotta eat and keep up with the mortgage, too) and get them out of his ass hairs.

The sooner, the better for all parties involved.

My Honor Student Gets Stoned

In the same city that Abraham Lincoln gave his Gettysburg Address- some six and a half score and three years ago- a mother awarded her 13-year old son a few hits of marijuana for finishing his homework.

Now imagine this. I come home from...let's say Park Street Middle School in Grove City, Ohio (where I went to in the sixth and seventh grades. GO PUMAS!), my English teacher, Mr. DiTallico (one of my favorite seventh grade teachers) or even Mrs, Houghton (that dreaded sixth grade math teacher. A conservative radio talk show host's wife- no names, please!- looks just like her) gives me homework. I come home, finish my homework, and my parents, Joe and Reida, gives me pot for my reward. Now, of course, that didn't happen, but what if it did? I- along with my siblings, Renee; Josh; Missy; and Shelly- would've been one really happy camper, no doubt.

Well, the mother, Amanda Livelsberger, 30, recently pled guilty for misdemeanor charges of corrpting minors; possession with intent to deliver; possesion of a small amount of marijuana- should've moved to Oregon, Mandy. We're more liberal with pot laws- and a few other charges.

I'm not exactly for the child smoking pot, but if he's at home, under parental guidance, I don't think it's any of the government's damn business what happens. After all, what happens behind closed doors should stay behind closed doors.

Of course, I can't help but wonder if the producers of Showtime's Weeds are reading this story.

Where Were You On September 11, 2001?

It's a question that will be asked today.

Where were you on September 11, 2001? What were you doing? No doubt your reaction was of horror, shock...surprise. Anger at those responsible. No doubt we all felt that on that horrendous Tuesday morning, when life here in the United States forever changed. When the security and peaceful complacency we felt since the end of World War II, perhaps, have ended. If you put the events in terms of Don Henley's End of the Innocence, then you will have been pretty much right on the money.

Myself, I was in New Orleans, Louisiana. Now, you have to remember that New Orleans is only an hour behind New York (New York's in the Eastern time zone, as New Orleans is in the Central). I hadn't yet learned of the planes going into the world Trade Center, or into the Pennsylvania field, or the Pentagon in Washington DC, when I went to work at the Louisiana Superdome (to help clean up for the Saints' home opener against the San Francisco 49ers, which was to commence on the 16th).

I cannot remember exactly what row I was cleaning (though it was, if I'm correct, somewhere in the midlevel on the...I think riverside area of the Dome. As you know, in New Orleans, locals refer to the side of the street closest to the Mississippi River as 'riverside; and the side of the street closest to lake Ponchartrain as 'lakeside'), but around 11:30AM Central time, the supervisor, Mary Wilson, told everyone to stop what they were doing, take their supplies- supplies being mops, brooms, and buckets- to the supply room and evacuate. Now a lot of us worked for this temp agency named Temps Today, so Mary had to sign us out.

As soon as I left the Dome, I went to the Wendy's across the street to get a combo- I think I got a Triple combo, supersized (or as Wendy's call it Biggie). I walked a couple blocks to Duncan Plaza, which is across the street from City Hall, and I saw these buses from the New Orleans RTA (Regional Transit authority) and Jefferson Parish Transit Administration going up and down Loyola Avenue with the signs having either being "Evacuation" or "Emergency" on them. So I turned on the radio to WWL AM 870, one of the big stations in the Big Easy. It was then I had learned that something had happened to the tower. It took me some time to digest what had happened- the towers collapsing, and what not. So I thought to myself, a disaster happened at the World Trade Center.

About an hour after I finished lunch, I went to the New Orleans Public Library, which was also across the street from Duncan Plaza, only a block and a half north on the corner of Loyola and Tulane Avenues. As soon as I got on the computer, I went to the website of WABC-TV Channel 7, New York's ABC flagship station, .

It was only then I had witnessed the horror as planes flew deliberately into both towers of the World Trade Center. I sat horrified as I watched innocents jump from the towers, in vain efforts to save themselves from the inferno. And of people running for their lives from the collapsing towers, and the smoke from them.

Moments later, I learned that the Pentagon had been struck. Fortunately, not many people were in that wing that got hit. Then there is the account of the vain yet heroic efforts of those who tried to regain control of United 93 in Pennsylvania.

No doubt, September 11, 2001 will go down in infamy. Many, myself included, likened the terrorist attacks to the events of December 6, 1941- when another terrorist attack happened on our shores. One that forced our hand, and brought us into an World War. Those events, of course, being the attack on Pearl Harbor, Hawai'i and World War II. In fact, many could call it this generation's Pearl Harbor.

New York City was shown a lot of love in the intervening days. The attacks seemed to have humbled them, and the big, mean image that they've been known for likely have softened that day.

The terrorists' intent, of course, was to bring the United States of America to its' knees. But instead of tearing the country apart, it brought us together. No matter the race, no matter the political party. No matter the sexual orientation even (Pat Robertson and Jerry Falwell's knuckleheaded statement that gays, lesbians, and pro-choice folks brought on the events of 9/11 notwithstanding), people of America showed the world that nobody- especially some Islamofacist bastards- would tear us apart. I remember not long after the attacks, I bought a US flag pin, and wore it proudly. Also, in the intervening days and weeks, I've seen many images of anger and pride, intermixed across the country. In New Orleans, I saw this pickup truck passing
the Line 16/South Claiborne RTA bus I rode en route back to the (Temps Today) office reading WE'RE GONNA GET YOU!, In smaller letters, the caption read RIP, WTC, 9/11/01. I remember drawing (more like sketching) a picture of Osama bin Laden, with his eyes crossed- and a target right between his eyes. Oh, yes. I hated- and still do to this day, hate- him.

Speaking of that spawn of Satan, when I saw the picture of that bastard on the front page of The (New Orleans) Times-Picayune about a month later, let's just say that I had to hold myself back from throwing the first object I could pick up. To just fucking gloat as he rehashed details of how he planned the attacks...I just felt like running into Saudi Arabia- or wherever the fuck he hid at- finding him, then have him die a very slow, and painful death. I still feel this way to this day, only, our military troops are doing the job for me. Sure, we still haven't found the bastard yet, but I live for the day when we do. In fact, I'd love to see a televised public execution of Mr. bin Laden. That would do me proud!



Now here it is, five years later. I'm back in Portland, Oregon, about to head to Los Angeles. Will America be terrorized again? Who knows when it will happen again, if so? After all, several more attempts have been made- most recently, the plot to blow up planes coming from Great Britain using plain old liquids and objects. I won't play Mr. Worrywart and say that it'll be a matter of time before America gets terrorized again- be it from Islamofacists, or from members of our own citizentry, even.

The events of 9/11/01 have made us more vigilant and alert, no doubt. Let's not wait until the next terrorist attack to wake up to the danger we constantly face daily.

Storm Large- Portland Still Loves You, Baby (And I Love You, Too)

Storm Large, Portland's rock goddess was booted off CBS' Rockstar: Supernova last night.

The goddamn travesty, those damn judges and those caller who decided that she wasn't fight for Supernova- which consists of former Motley crue drummer Tommy Lee; Metallica's Jason Newsted; and former Guns N' Roses axeman Gilby Clarke (how is working with Axl Rose working out, Gilb?). They don't know a good thing when they see it! Storm sang her balls (or ovaries) out. A total class act. Yes, she had a few missteps, but come on, no one's perfect.

Don't worry, Stormy. You're still a class act to me, and the rest of your adoring fams here in Portland. We look forward to your triumphant return to Dante's, alongside your kick ass group, The Balls, and believe me when I say this, baby. You are a Storm to be reckoned with- and that's no pun.

Somehow, I get the feeling that those guys in Supernova will be even sorrier that they let Storm go. Now they have to put up with Dilana's torture longer. In fact, I fucking hope she gives them nightmares in their sleep. Singing...no, screeching, and hollering. Gee, I'd feel safer hearing the Wicked Witch of the West (from the Wizard of Oz) singing (and cackling...picture Dilana cackling the line, "I'll get you, my pretties...and that goddamned dog, too!").

Strangely enough, I found Storm and Dilana to be a very sexy couple. No, really. Stormy, the six foot gorgeous chatenuse from Portland (by way of Massachusetts), and Dilana, the...um...well, at least Dilana's not a bad looking chick (I say this as I put my fingers in my mouth, and make a gagging gesture).

The great thing about Storm was she handled the call (that she didn't make the cut) with grace and dignity. She does, indeed, do Portland very proud.

May there be sellouts at every venue you play from here on out, Storm.

Welcome home.

Maurice Clarett...I HATE YOU!

Man, I am getting SO. GODDAMN. SICK. Of this Maurice Clarett jackal. OOOOOOOOOOOOOH! I'm ready to smash this keyboard and monitor apart I'mm so mad! ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGH!
Man, just when I'm finally getting the message that I can never, never, NEVER, EVER(!) go back home (to Columbus, Ohio) again, something keep pulling me back!

Maurice Clarett, as we all know, was arrested numerous times over the past year over weapons charges- January, he was arrested for robbing someone, and most recently, in August when he was carrying an arsenal of loaded weapons. Kind of makes you wonder if he's recruiting for or is joining al-Qaida, i know one thing though. His future in the NFL has gone to SHIT CITY! SHIT! SHIT! SHIT! SHIT!

Today he was indicted on those weapons charges, plus charges on fleeing police, at Franklin County Courthouse. If he's convicted, he gets to waste a year in jail- as if he hasn't already wasted oxygen- let alone his talent!

Please, Maurice. Just check yourself off this planet. Get one of those loaded guns, put the fucking thing in your mouth, and pull the trigger. Spare all of us- from the Ohio State University down to your baby (and your baby momma)- the grief, and just take your ticket straight down to hell.

Well, If You're Gonna Die...Die Fucking Happy!

Remember that series on Showtime called Zalman King's Red Shoe Diaries? The host was played by The X-Files David Duchovny (I think I still have a crush on him...then again, I have one on country superstar Tim McGraw...different animal, though for the record, that doesn't make me gay or even bi...).

The above is an excerpt from the DVD called Picnic. Happily, Zalman King has brought back The Red Shoes Diaries (though it no longer airs on Showtime) for all of us to enjoy.

I know one thing, man and woman, I need to get my fucking hands on a digital camera and camcorder. FAST!

So sit back and enjoy.

Warren Steed Jeffs- Controlling His Followers From Jail

The manhunt for the polygamist, Fundementalist Latter Day Saints leader Warren Steed Jeffs ended Monday night in Las Vegas when he was arrested outside the city on a routine traffic stop. (It's the small shit that gets you, Warren. You've got to remember that, 'kay?).

Jeffs is charged with arranging marriages between underaged girls and older men. Makes me ask, "Warren, ever thought of creating NAMGLA- North American Man-Girl Love Association- you know, just like NAMBLA, only substitute 'girl' for 'boy'. At least it's heterosexual in nature if nothing else. (I've Googled 'North American Man-Girl Love Association, and 'NAMGLA'. No such animals- as far as I know- exists. Perhaps Warren Jeffs can confirm that an group called NAMGLA exists...I don't know...).

And now, many of his followers in Colorado City, Arizona and Hildale, Colorado (I had erroneously mentioned that the city was located in Utah) are going at great lengths to protect this bozo, preventing the media from interviewing them (those who think that he's a whack job did say that he's glad that he was captured, so there's hope for these folks after all). Apparently, they're now fasting over his arrest, and his 'persecution' (this is where I roll back my head and laugh uproariously! HA! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!) because, to them, he is still their prophet. And since they're keeping the media at bay, I must say that this group, the Fundementalist Latter Day Saints, must be more sinister and evil (and I must say presumably racist. I did hear excerpts of a speech from Jeffs about a person who is black being, well, less than a saint of God...or did he mean that the person had bad hygiene? Help me out, Elder Prophet Jeffs!) than we in the 'corrupt' outside world realize.

Now, what if, say, a radical version of the Southern Baptists did this? Sure, you wouldn't have the polygamy; but I'm thinking that it'll resemble the South of the 1950s, where the black folks stay on one side of the fence, the white folks on the other. (Latinos, Asians; Arabs and native Americans need not apply). How would this reflect on the Southern Baptist Convention?

The same thing goes with the Mormons. Now, admittedly, I don't think too much of the Mormons (or for that matter, the Southern Baptists- even though officially, I am one). The FLDS are pretty much giving the Mormons a black eye, even though the Mormons themselves have long disassociated themselves from the FLDS.

I hope that Jeffs gets the maximum penalty allowed by law- and that the authorities take over Colorado City and Hildale (that is, if the residents of those two cities don't do a Waco, Texas- Jim Jones/ David Koresh style barbeque first).

Katrina- One Year Later: Chapter Two

I'm watching live footage from the CBS station in New Orleans, WWL-TV, Channel 4. At this moment, they're ringing what is called the 'Katrina Bell' at the main Roman Catholic Church in the city, St. Louis Cathedral, on Jackson Square (Chartres and St. Ann Streets. The spot in front of St. Louis Cathedral has a mark bearing the late Pope John Paul II's visit almost 20 years ago).

Bells are tolling all over the metro area, commemorating the first anniversary of Hurricane Katrina's path of destruction and death.

The bell tolling, I think I can understand. After all, this was the worst natural disaster- thus far- to strike the US. But after all the bell tolling, and the mourning- some which will go on forever- the people of New Orleans must move on, and rebuild. Be stronger than before Katrina hit, lest they fall again.

I recall a year ago, as I watched safely in the confines of Portland, Oregon, I wrote in a journal entry- I believe that I still have that journal- that Katrina, as a Category 5 hurricane, could completely level the city. Although she came in as a slightly less damaging, but no less dangerous Category 3, Katrina did indeed level a good part of the city, and left a good number of people in desolation. But as I look back at this on this the first anniversary, it is my belief that if a disaster the magnitude of Katrina could destroy a city, imagine Portland being struck by, say, a magnitude of, say 6 (on the Ricther Scale) earthquake. Or even the 'Big One' that may strike Los Angeles (yes, I'll be in the City of Angels when- and if- it happens...).

No one knows when the next big disaster will strike. It could be in a minute; the next day. The next year, even. All we can do is be better prepared, not complacent.
The folks in New Orleans, those who stayed because they've ridden out many tropical storms and hurricanes before, or because they had no way of getting out (I blame political incompetence here, but that's another subject fore another day), probably felt like, "hey, this Katrina bitch is just another storm." Of course, some are now asking, "where was Nash Roberts where we needed him?" (Nash Roberts, 88, is a retired WWL-TV meteorologist. He had a uncanny ability to predict how dangerous the storm would be. All he needed was a magic marker and paper. No glitzy computer graphic mumbo-jumbo. Thankfully, he and his wife made it through Katrina. They were evacuated).

Let us not forget the 1800 victims of Katrina's wrath. And let us move on, rebuild, and continue to live.

Katrina- One Year Later

Today is the first anniversary of the disaster that was Hurricane Katrina.

On August 29, 2005, three levees- the 17th St. Canal near Metairie; the Industrial Canal in the Lower Ninth Ward; and the London Canal were breached by Katrina, which blew through the Gulf (of Mexico) as a Category 3 hurricane. You already know of the horror of seeing houses underwater, and folks- many of them black and poor- screaming for help. The Gulfport-Biloxi-Pascagoula area wasn't spared either, as at least one town was completely destroyed by Katrina. Over 1800 souls were lost throughout the Gulf region.

There are the arguments over whether New Orleans should be rebuilt or not. Some say that New Orleans is a integral part of American history, as it is the birth place of jazz, not to mention the fact that it had survived other major hurricanes before Katrina (Betsy in 1965; Camille in 1969). Others say that rebuilding on land that is a dozen feet below sea level is foolish, and the land that was- and in many parts of what was once the Lower Ninth Ward, still is- damaged would be best left off returning to wetland. Those who support rebuilding say that it'll bring back a sense of community, and no Halliburton corporate type is gonna take it over and turn it into the equivalent of, say Miami Beach (or even Portland, Oregon's Pearl District and San Francisco's SoMa). Those who are against it say that the government shouldn't dump billions of dollars into rebuilding, that the job is best left to private developers.

However you want to look at it, we all can agree that New Orleans is part of Americana, and if we were to lose it altogether, we lose part of America. And if we lose one part of America, what's not to say that other parts will die come the next major disaster or terrorist attack.

Did He Kill JonBenet?- Chapter Three: HELL, NO!

The final chapter on John Mark Karr, the suspect in JonBenet Ramsey's murder, has been closed.

The verdict: He didn't do it!

The DNA taken from him did not match that found on Jonbenet's underwear, which means Mr. Karr is pretty much a free man- unless, of course, the authorities decide to take him to the loony bin (there is that thing about his having a thing for little children).

Sounds to me that Karr's confession a couple weeks ago was coerced, and if it so happens that it was, I'd sue the ass off of those interrogators. The Thai authorities; the FBI if they were involved, and just about everypone else who had a hand in framing a man now considered innocent.

Now, I have a question for the Thai authorities. Why didn't you just come out and say that you arrested Karr for having a young girl on his lap at a school? And why didn't they tell the truth, that he was under surveillance and suspicion of being a pedophile in Thailand?

And I have to kind of feel sorry for Boulder County District Attorney Mary Lacy, who wanted this to be a slam dunk. At the same time, I- like everyone else around America- must hold her feet to the fire. After all, in a rush for justice, the bitch just got in over her head. I'm sure that the voters of Boulder County will give her a thank you note come time for her re-election campaign.

Denis Leary and Lenny Clarke Dis Mel Gibson

At a Boston Red Sox game, playing on Boston area cable channel INHD, comedian/actors Lenny Clarke and Denis Leary (FX's Rescue Me) briefly called the Tigers-Red Sox game.

Only, they pick on a certain Jew-hating New York-born Australian actor who had a bit too much of the holy wine, then got arrested while driving under influence of that Jesus Juice.

Click on the title, and try to keep a straight face.

Buh-Bye, Tom: Paramount Cuts Ties With Tom Cruise

Oh, Tom.
Tom, Tom, Tom, Tom, Tom, Tom, TOM!

WHat have we brought forth this time?

The misadventures of one Thomas Cruise Mapother IV continues as the 94-year-old motion picture powerhouse Paramount Pictures Corporation decided that dealing with one 44-year-old Scientologist, who allegedly has a daughter named Surly, er, Suri by Katie Holmes, was a bit too much of a Mission: Impossible.

Admittedly, the 14 year relationship between Paramount and Cruise/Wagner Productions (with producing partner Paula Wagner) was a pretty good one. But like all relationships, this one had to end- in this case, by divorce. It could have been his off screen behavior that was the last straw for Paramount, or the fact that Paramount's gotten sick of those crazy Scientologists. I don't know. But you have to admit that Mr. Cruise's career has been headed south of the border (of A-list) lately (Mission: Impossible III- as much as I personally liked it- pretty much tanked at the box office). Paramount has slashed financial support for Cruise/Wagner Productions, and that the public pretty much hates him (so does Oprah, by the way. Remember that couch jumping incident last year? Ewww!)



Whatever the reasons, it looks like ol' Tommy's a free agent again. His star power hasn't yet diminished to the point that he has to start starring in and producing B-movies- hell, he can star in and produce a few TV series if he wants- but he's not as popular as he once was.

If I were him, I'd seriously reconsider staying in Scientology. That seems to be a deal breaker for him as of late.

Did He Kill JonBenet- Chapter Two: My Romance with JonBenet

Today, in Los Angeles, John Paul Karr, the 41-year-old suspect in the murder of little six-year-old beauty JonBenet Patricia Ramsey, waived extradition, which means that this spineless feck is headed back to Boulder, Colorado to face charges on first degree murder, felony murder, first degree kidnapping; and sexual assualt on a child.

Now, comes word that Mr. Karr may have had a sexual fixation on JonBenet. In fact, he had sexual fixations on children for quite sometime. In 2001, he was arrested on charges of possessing child pornography. Karr said that he had sex with JonBenet, and accidentally killed her as he violated her. Sick either way, if you ask me.

Of course, the DNA results will ultimately tell whether the DNA found in JonBenet's panties belongs to Karr- or not. If so, case obviously closed (Karr is apparently at peace with his fate). If not, well, at least the authorities did get some mental case off the street.

Also go to http://www.kusa.com for the latest on the JonBenet Ramsey murder case. Also, go to http://www.thesmokinggun.com to see documents on the murder. The arrest warrant should be unsealed any day now. I'll have the link here.

I'd Keep the Second Phallus

India man with two penises to undergo surgery from PhysOrg.com

An Indian man born with two penises wants to get one of them removed so that he can marry, a report said Saturday.

[...]

Yes, the above story is from Physorg.com. I didn't quite believe this when I heard this story this morning on The Stephanie Miller Show, but when I Googled this story and went to the website, I was thinking, "Dude, keep the second dick!"

Come on, peeps! I would kill to have a second dick. Just look at the things I could do with it! Talk about a pretty good chance of having many a menage a trois setting here. And if one dick doesn't work, the other will. Having a back up, to be quite honest, is a very good thing indeed. Man, who needs fucking Viagra (or Cialis, or Levitra) when you have that second cock (of course, if neither rises with the sun, then any of the three can come in handy. Just know that you'll have twice the hard-on...).

Not to mention that I can fuck two women at once- or if my woman likes it in the ass- and I've met women like this (hey, anal sex isn't just for gay men, you know...)- one dick can sidle its' way into that poop chute, the other in the kitty. I know it may take a bit of coordination there, but, man, once I get the hang of it, the wonders I can perform.

In all seriousness- if you can call it that- the condition called diphallus, or penile duplication, and (unfortunately) it's an extremely rare condition- it's found in one in 5.5 million men (why couldn't I be one of those lucky few?), and only 100 cases have been reported since 1609- almost 400 FUCKING YEARS AGO?!!! DAMN!

My advice to him- KEEP THE SECOND COCK, MAN! DON'T CASTRATE IT! Just think of the possibilities, dude! Adult film producers in Van Nuys, California, if they're looking at this story, are probably salivating over this and are looking for this young man as I write this!

That second cock can make you, my east Indian friend, very, very, VERY(!) rich.

Did He Kill JonBenet?

As the world knows by now, John Paul Karr, a schoolteacher, has been charged with the murder of JonBenet Ramsey. The little beauty queen was killed then years ago this Christmas, and her parents, Jon and his late wife Patsy, were for a time charged with killing her.

Karr confessed that he had "accidentally" killed JonBenet, and even sexually assaulted her. But a lot of questions are being raised on whether this rush to justice may have resulted in capturing the wrong person.

Like Christmas Day 1996, for example. As we know, JonBenet was killed the day after. Fingernail fragments were found, and obviously other evidence was found. Unless DNA evidence links Karr to the murder, and unless his semen was found in the area on JonBenet's underwear, then it looks like the case goes back to where it started- zilch. And another thing, Karr's then-wife said that he was in Alabama at the time of the killing.

Like everyone else, I too was caught up in the fervor that they have caught the killer of JonBenet Ramsey. But now, I'm sort of at a crossroads here. I must give Mr. Karr the benefit of the doubt here, yet I must also prepare for the possibility that they may have railroaded an innocent man. And another botch-up is not what Boulder County District Attorney Mary Lacy wants

Clash of the Titans

You guys are supposed to be scrapping with the New Orleans Saints players- not among yourselves!

Tennessee Titans running back LenDale White, the rookie from USC, got into a scuffle with fellow player, safety Donnie Nickey. As you watch the video, you can see that LenDale was shoved from behind. And apparently, LenDale doesn't take it very well.

The Saints are at Nashville, playing as I write this.

The Pedophile Politicians

The Brotherly Love, Freedom, and Diversity Party is a political party in the Netherlands. (Their Dutch initials are PNVD and translated in Dutch is De de Brodederlijke Lifde, de Vrijheid, en Partij van de Diverisiteit) .

This party advocates lowering the age of consent from 16 to 12, and also for the legalization of hard drugs and bestiality.

On July 17, a Dutch court refused to ban the self-confessed group of pedophiles from forming a political party- hence, the named (for the Dutch court's explanation, go to http://www.government.nl/actueel/nieuwsarchief/2006/07July/24/pnvd.jsp. Also take a look at http://www.government.nl/actueel/0-42-1_42-81930.jsp ). The court says that it will closely monitor the group.

The group is seeking 60,000 votes to win a seat in the Dutch Parliament- though it's likely that they'll get only 1,000 (after all, many pedophiles prefer anonymity). But in the off chance that they do get those 60,000 votes and win that seat in Parliament, this could set off a troubling precedent, in my opinion. This could mean that NAMBLA- the North American Man-Boy Love Association- could be free to form their own little political party (at least when the next Democrat reaches the Oval Office...After all, the Dems are accused of being a bit too liberal themselves...my party is definitely leaving me...), and every law that protects children- every Jessica's Law; every Megan's Law- could be ruled unconstitutional (with the help of our friends in the American Civil Liberties Union, of course...they have their usefulness sometimes, but much of the times, they don't). I don't mean to spread fear or anything, but I see a potentially troubling tide up ahead. After all, even if the NVPD doesn't get those votes to win a seat this time, in due time, they'll come up with something clever enough to lull everyone into their way of thinking. And then after that, NAMBLA may try the same tactics here.

America, this is a risk we cannot afford to take.