Liz, Where's Your Ring, Honey?

I can explain this.

You see, Liz Edwards and myself have started an affair. You know, as revenge for that good-for-nothing cad cheating on her. And he did it while running for the office of el presidente AND while she's dealing with cancer. How in the fuck can he do such a thing?

All kidding on the Liz loves Darren tryst aside, Elizabeth Edwards went to Washington this week to talk about health care. But many had noticed that Ms. (forget about calling her 'Mrs.')Edwards wasn't wearing her wedding band. which may mean that one, she may have forgotten it accidentally on purpose, or that she may have left it behind. Accidentally on purpose. Either way, it looks like Liz may have come to her senses and dumped that son of a bitch John out to the pig sty, where he can oink like one while stoking Miss Piggy (go ahead, Johnny. Roll in the mud...).

As we all know by now, John had an affair with a filmmaker who chronicled his presidential run. Rielle Hunter said at the time of the revelation (of the affair) that John is the baby daddy of the girl she gave birth to earlier this year. John still denies this, so I guess we're going to have to make a call to TV talk show host Maury Povich, and put ol' Johnny on Maury. Imagine the ratings skyrocketing over that.

(C)2008 by Darren W. Alexander. All Rights Reserved.